So, I Went Out

Yesterday was an all around recipe for failure. πŸ˜’ I was still dealing with the pharmacy issues andΒ already feeling like shit, but I had made a promise to a friend and I was determined to not be a disappointment again. 😞 For her birthday, a couple of months ago I bought Cassi two tickets to a concert she wanted to see at the Newport, and that show was last night. It was never my intention to go with her, as I just can’t do it right now (I didn’t even go see Skillet at Winter Jam) but I wanted her to be able to take a friend or her sister to share the fun with.

Unfortunately they didn’t have a ride to get to the show, so I went up there, picked them up, took them to the show, dropped ’em off, and then I had to find something to do until the show was over and I could pick them up again, take them home, and then make my way back home myself. πŸ€” I didn’t mind doing that at all… it was part of the gift. But I was already in bad shape before I left, and the sea of humans and traffic on campus only made things worse. 😬 I was gonna just find some thrift stores or something to kill time, but there were just too many people so I needed to go elsewhere.

That lead to one of the high points of my evening at least, after deciding to go over to Hollywood Casino. I hadn’t been there since maybe last summer, and I remembered that being in a casino often masks my pain… but not so much last night. 😐 It was fun, but not fun, if that makes sense. 😏 Too much time in the car, too much sitting in uncomfortable chairs… and it just kept getting worse. The one saving grace is that I kept losing and winning at a rate that had me only slightly down from when I walked in – and then right when I was leaving, I hit on a machine that Jim always says I should play. πŸ˜ƒπŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ This makes the second time he’s picked a winner for me.

But anyway, by the time I got home around 11pm… omg… worst neck pain that I’ve had in months. πŸ˜“ I’m not yet going to assume that the steroid injection is wearing off, since there were other factors, but yeah… it took exhaustion to finally make me sleep, because there wasn’t a single position that I could turn to that would make it go away. That sort of pain that makes a person go, “Oh shit… I’m really screwed if it just stays like this.” But like I said, thankfully, today the pain was down probably 90% from yesterday.

I guess I should wrap this up. 😏 Waking up feeling somewhat okay today… it’s allowed me to sit and plan my way towards the weekend in a way that I might be functional and okay. Don’t get me wrong, I hate that have to do any of this, and I hate that I have these days where I know I should do absolutely nothing, before baby-stepping my way out of it… but despite how it makes me look or how it may affect others, I have to start figuring out how to not be physically miserable and emotionally fucked because of it. πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ

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It Works For Me

Today was really nice. πŸ™‚ And I know, it’s not over yet, so it could still get all fuckered up… heh… but this was the most relaxed and carefree that I’ve felt in a good long while. It’s amusing though, that I had to useΒ most of the previous dayΒ to set myself up for it, so that today would go down properly. 😏 But hey, I’m making progress – even if it’s just a day at a time.

I spent the afternoon watching the NASCAR race from Kansas, and now I’m getting ready to watch the season eight premiere of The Walking Dead. πŸ˜ƒ Along with that frivolous time spent, I’ve also started working on a “to do” list of things that I seriously need to accomplish before fall sets in, ranging from personal health issues to random landscaping tasks that I’ll need to hire someone to handle for me.

But along with a “responsibilities” list, I’m also thinking about doing what I’ve done a couple times in the past – where I make a long list of all of the memorable toys and goodies that I’ve owned when I was as young as a toddler, so I can then look them all up on eBay to see how much they’re worth now. πŸ˜„ I thought I actually saved the list the last time I typed it up and did this, but apparently it got lost between owning my last laptop and this one.

But it’s just a fun possible side project… and while it can be surprising how much some of the things can be worth now, it’s not like it’s a depressing exercise where I’m wishing that I had saved them all or kept all of my toys sealed in their packages, never to be played with – because what kind of boring childhood would I have had then, if I never played with the stuff that was meant to be played with? πŸ˜‹

But yeah, I’m hoping that I can hold on to this positive mood into tomorrow… or at least long enough for me to go in town and get a haircut. That’s another thing that has a surprisingly positive effect on me, when I no longer feel like a hobo and can come across as quite presentable if I so choose. 😎 But for now, here’s to more days like this one.

Oh, Is That So?

I’ve been on and off the phone so much in the past couple of days, I’m fairly certain that my brain is at least partially melted. 😏 I joke, but Jesus I hate talking on the phone. πŸ˜‘ Especially when it deals with “shit that needs to be taken care of” or the like. One of my calls should have been relatively painless (or at least as painless as phone calls can be for me)Β since IΒ thought it was gonnaΒ be just a brief conversation with my casino host about reserving a room at the Rising Star casino boat.

Feeling rather miserable here at home still, I was thinking that a change of scenery could do me some good… so I decided to call and see about getting one of those little mini-suites like I’ve gotten several times before when I’ve stayed. 😎 Now, it’s been while since I’ve stayed and played there, but not that long. So I didn’t think I’d run into any problems. πŸ˜’ Wrong.

I wasn’t able to speak to my casino host, but the one that I did speak to… she informed me rather quickly that they couldn’t guarantee me one of the suites, and that they wouldn’t even be able to tell me until I was actually there and preparing to check in. πŸ€” What kind of bullshit is that? I mean, just type in my player’s card number… look at my history… this shouldn’t be a complicated decision.

But nope… they’d reserve a room for me, but if I wasn’t one of their higher ranked players on the day that I was checking in, it would be a standard crappy room for me and whoever I end up taking with me. And to that news I replied, “Okay, well thanks anyway.” and hung up. In a followup e-mail with myΒ casino host, I told her that I was literally staring at a stack of flyers, cards, comps, and calendars from Jack Cincinnati – including an offer for a suite in my choice of several downtown hotels.

And it’s not like I even played that much the last time I was at Jack. They just have better offers, and they don’t hesitate to reserve a suite for me when I’m arranging my accommodations. πŸ™‚ They don’t make me feel like I have to be in competition with my fellow guestsΒ just to get a nicer room. I concluded the e-mail by telling her that I wasn’t saying what I was saying in an effort to fish for more comps or anything, and that, in fact, she should remove my name from their advertising list.

Better comps, better room, bigger casino, 45 minute shorter drive, less hassle… the final decision of where to go was suddenly no decision at all, because the place where I had gone for years with my family and then on my own… it just left a bad taste in my mouth now. Funny thing is, after that conversation I was kinda done thinking about casinos for the day – so I haven’t even bothered to try and set anything up with Jack yet, and I’m not even sure if I will. πŸ™„πŸ˜

Incomplete

I did it again… got a little too excited or whatever, before I actually had those tubs in my hand so that I could get started on all the organizing that I wanted to do. I got the notification from Target that my order was ready to pick up, followed by a notification that they had to cancel the purchase of five of the storage bins. πŸ˜’ So almost half of my order was cancelledΒ but they still expect me to drive 30 miles to pick up them up. Umm, no. 😠 Your site said you had even more than 12. Your site let me place an order for 12. This is not going to be “my problem” now.

I sent their customer service folks a message, asking them to cancel the rest of the items in my order. If I need 12 tubs of the same size and same color, getting a little more than half of that really isn’t going to help me. 😐 I’ve yet to get a response, and it’s been a couple hours now. And yeah, it doesn’t mean that I can’t start sorting through all of the stuff anyway, but I was just so hyped for the purchase that it has really taken the wind out of my sails when it comes to my enthusiasm and ability.

I still have to start going through some of the boxes anyway, since Uncle Jay has tasked me with finding a few different things that might be in there. So I’m going to tune out the humans, do a little bit of that, tackle the mail from the past week and a half, and generally just do random stuff around here that has been lurking in the back of my mind, nagging at me. I don’t quite have the oomph to go out and actually check Walmart, Menards, etc in person for suitable storage bins today, but hopefully tomorrow. 😬

I really hope Target will be kewl about this. I don’t want to have to get noisy.