Non-Plan Plans

I need to start falling asleep to music rather than the TV. It would be one thing if I could just pick a channel and let it play and fall asleep… but I’ll find something interesting, watch it, find something else interesting, watch it, etc – and that process went all through the night until 9am this morning. 😳 I almost fell asleep before the sun came up, but then I discovered VUDU has some free movies available, including Toy Soldiers and Hollow Man… both of which I like and hadn’t seen in forever.

So of course I ended up sleeping most of the day away once I did fall asleep. But so far, so good with my back… still slowly getting better, and this will be my first “good” weekend to work around the house, so that’s still the plan – although I’m slowly winding up for it, and probably won’t start ’til it gets dark. I don’t have any obligations for at least the next couple of days, so even though I jacked my schedule I can still just do whatever whenever and sleep when my brain decides it’s time.

Sure wish the overcast skies would clear up before the Perseids meteors have passed though. πŸ˜•

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Lots Of Thinking

Superstition is silly, but I still feel like I’m gonna jinx myself… but I’ve actually noticed a bit of improvement over the past 24 hours. I’ve been feeling confident enough to shuffle around the house as needed without the damn cane, but still hunched over and taking super careful steps. And even though I’m only sleeping a couple hours at a time, at least the pain hasn’t been worse when I wake up.

I’ve definitely learned that I wasn’t remotely prepared for something like this. When it is difficult to even take ten steps, having my shoes by the door, the remotes on the couch, my phone by the chair, my pills back in the bedroom, unfolded laundry in the basket, the pop out in the garage…Β it’s like I left myself an unintentional endurance course to run. Oh, and going out for groceries? Heh… yeah.

I’d be embarrassed right now if someone had to come in to this house to help me, because it’s frozen in a state where the dishes haven’t been done, the carpet hasn’t been vacuumed, clothes haven’t been put away, etc… and I feel like that person would think that this is just how I live.Β I dunno… when you’re feeling good you just take for granted that you’re going to continue feeling good and so all that shit doesn’t matter because you “know” you’ll be able to easily get to it at some point.

It definitely makes me sympathize with older folks who’ve just become less mobile over the years, who have to save their energy for key things and sometimes have to let other things go for a while, if not for good. Meh… it’s hard to explain… I guess I’m just saying that you never really understand until you’re going through it yourself, even if it is (hopefully) temporary. Hangin’ in there though…

Exhausted

The experience at the chiropractor today was fairly positive. I wasn’t even sure I was going to be able to make myself go in town for it after sleeping only a few hours and waking up barely able to take a step again this morning. 😟 By the time I took a shower and got dressed, I was almost done… but knowing that my car would evenly heat my back and butt on the way was just enough to keep me focused.

I’m already self-conscious about anyone seeing me like this, all hunched over, walking super slow with a cane… and yayhow lucky for me… the chiropractor’s office is downtown, and the effing Art Walk is going on – so there were people everywhere. 😣 I parked off of the road though and was able to slowly sneak in, with a nice older lady who saw me coming from inside and opened the door for me – joking as she left that it would be ten dollars for the extra service. 😏 I really appreciated that, because I’m sure she could see in my face how I felt, and she was sweet and wanted to give me a little levity that didn’t come off as pity.

The doctor was nice (they are considered doctors right?) and seemed to genuinely care about what he was doing. Asked me loads of questions, and manipulated my legs in all sorts of awful ways during the exam portion. Did you know that there’s an “excruciating pain button” on the back of your knee? Cuz there is. Heh… I told him not to worry about doing things that would hurt, since I knew that it would help him diagnose. His conclusion was what I hoped/figured… most likely “just” an irritated disk with inflamed areas that are royally pissing off my sciatic nerve. (Which is what the “excruciating pain button” is connected to.)

Sadly, he told me to stop putting heat on it… the only thing that really makes the pain temporarily go away. πŸ˜’ I’m supposed to ice it as much as possible over the next few days, as well as move as much as possible – within reason, of course. I’m supposed to go see him three more times next week. I’m glad that he’s willing and able to jam a bunch of treatment into such a short time, but I’m nervous. 😳 Today kicked my ass. I mean, the stuff that he did to relieve the stress on the muscles actually did work, and I was able to stand up straight for a few moments afterwards, but the goody was only good enough to get me home. πŸ˜” I don’t know how I’m gonna be able to do three chiropractor appointments, a blood draw, and an ultrasound all being jammed into one week. (My fault for not getting my blood drawn already, but I sure didn’t anticipate this back shit.)

Okay, that’s about enough for now, but don’t be surprised if I come back to this topic. It’s really wearing me down, and “putting pen to paper” helps me to feel better, at least getting it out of my head.

Lawn Day

My lawn d00ds came to mow today, just minutes before the threatening looking clouds started letting out some sprinkles. 😯 They tore ass around the place to get it done as quickly as possible, but the storm clouds ended up mostly just blowing over without dropping anything. The mailman showed up at the same time as well, delivering my big jug of RoundUp “KILLS EVERYTHING IT TOUCHES” juice w/built-in pump and sprayer. πŸ˜ƒ (Yay for Amazon Prime w/free shipping.)

Weeds have basically taken over the entire line of spirea at the back of my property, so that’ll be the first place I test my aim to see if I can kill the weeds and just the weeds. 😬 There’s also a couple of flower beds that haven’t been converted to “just mow over it” quite yet, so I’m gonna do some unapologetic plant killin’ the next time we have a few days that aren’t so stinkin’ hot. I’ve got the plans in my head – we’ll just have to wait and see if I’m able to complete it all with any degree of success.

Once fall is here, and the landscaping folks are running out of things to do, I’ll probably have a few of them come here so I can get some quotes on how much it would be for them to bring a Bobcat here and just rip out the entire line of spirea. 🌳🌳🌳🌳🌳🚜 And not ghetto style, like I’ve done with a few things… I want them out, and once they’re out I wanna make that whole area look as if it was any other part of my lawn. 🀨 It’ll be weird not having that physical barrier to the neighbor’s yard anymore.

Meh… I’m just restless and my brain keeps pestering me. I should probably get my teefs and thyroid issue under control before I start sweating this other crap that falls into the “optional” category. πŸ˜’

Heat Index: 105Β°

Only slept about 4 hours, but feeling surprisingly good today. I think it helps having put my doctor appoint behind me, and then since the holiday is this week I’ve decided to not worry about the blood draw until next week… but I did go in town to pick up some meds, and OMGΒ is it hot out. 😳 Miserable, humid, hot hot hot. I only have the tiniest twinge of maybe wanting to go watch the fireworks tonight, but the heat does a pretty good job of beating that idea out of me. πŸŽ†πŸŽ‰ I know it’ll be cooler later, so we’ll see, but for now I’m back at home and trying to continue some progress.

Bills, finishing up the bedroom after building the new bed frame, maybe adding some more stuff to the “sale/auction” boxes in the purple room… I dunno… I just know that I have to take advantage of these energy bursts when I get them, so I’m gonna keep busy until I can’t keep busy any more. ️🀨 I’ll probably save all the computer stuff for this evening when I just wanna sit, so bills and e-mail and all that can wait until then.

Oh, and no emergency dental shit on the 4th, so we’ll see what tomorrow holds.Β οΈπŸ‘¨πŸ»β€βš•οΈ

3am Check-In

I’m having one of those nights where I find myself wide awake at 3am, so I came over here to barf out a blog entry… but now that I’ve done so, I realize that I don’t really have anything to talk about. πŸ˜’ Hmm… the night before last, I heard an incident on the police scanner where someone’s couch was set on fire and they were stabbed, and they even had to have a medical helicopter airlift them to a hospital in Columbus. 😳 And that was about all the info that they gave – which was sort of a tease… but of course I hope the d00d is okay.

I dunno… today was just kinda shitty, and this up-all-night crap isn’t going to help me in regards to tomorrow. I’m not going to count on tomorrow sucking though… but I am preparing myself just in case it does. I think that whenever I wake up, I should be able to shake it off and hit the reset button for the beginning of the week. πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈΒ We’ll see…

Alright… gonna go time-lapse the night sky again and see how that goes. πŸ€“

EDIT: I think what I need to do, is to just go ahead and say “Okay, you fucked up… tomorrow’s probably gonna be a write off.” and not stress myself out too much about trying to make tomorrow “count” – if I know that it’s just not gonna take. So, if I’m able to be productive or do the things I want tomorrow? Great. If not, then I’ll just cross my fingers, take some Tylenol PMs at a “normal” bedtime hour, and just try again the next day.

Mulligan

Today was one of those unexpected / inexplicable “I feel miserable and I’m not even sure why.” days. 😟 The weather didn’t help, being gray, rainy, and miserable all friggin’ day. I dunno, it was more than that though, which makes it that much more frustrating that I’m unable to put a finger on it. πŸ˜’ Meh… it’ll pass, and thankfully these bleh moments usually don’t last longer than a day lately.

I did get a lot of my little projects worked on yesterday and this morning though, so I can feel good about that. πŸ™‚ But in doing so, I’ve sorta F’d up my living room – with my typical “three-quarter circle of paperwork” surrounding me as I work on the living room floor. 😏 Heh… I’ve got two different desks at which I could probably sit when I do my “office stuff” – but my brain still insists on sitting on the floor for whatever reason. πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ Eventually my butt and back will likely have a talk with my brain, and things will probably change, but I bet that won’t happen for a long time.

I’ve been avoiding anything with substance for most of the day, so before I go to bed tonight I’ve yet to check my messages, voice mails, and email… but I should be able to get through those pretty quickly since I’ve been managing to somewhat keep up on them lately. πŸ€“ The cat appreciates that I haven’t moved much throughout the day as well… as she can sleep on the suitcase (still) where she can keep an eye on me, while also enabling her to wake up every hour or so to come over and get some pettins before going back to the suitcase and lying down again. 😺