Working The Kinks Out

It seems that, for a change, I did exactly what I needed to do to get myself feeling better from yesterday. ๐Ÿ˜ณ Before I even started The Walking Dead last night I raised shields, cut off communications, and let things remain that way until half way through the day today. I only slept about 6 hours, but walking up to the sun rising, as well as to a phone that I had no intention of checking… it’s like the minimal stress of wondering what my phone will want from me is sometimes enough to tip me to the bad side, where whatever I’m trying to shake will remain. ๐Ÿ˜ More of my weirdness, I suppose.

And it’s not like I’m in high demand or something… but it just helped everything about how I was feeling yesterday, to not be beholden to my phone or anyone wanting me for anything through it. (Make sentences bad, structure coming good tonight is not. ๐Ÿ˜…) And as they day progressed, even though I used the laptop to dick around on Twitter, I started feeling better. ๐Ÿ™‚ As I was watching Justice League I started straightening the living room. As I watched some news I went ahead and ran the vacuum. And then before I started some YouTube videos about scanner/radio frequencies, ๐Ÿค“ I took all the baskets of dirty clothes down to the basement and started a couple loads. All of that before I even thought about looking at my phone. ๐Ÿ˜€

When I did, I was relieved to see that I only had a couple messages waiting for me, and nothing on my social media of any importance. The world went on just fine without me. SHIT. I do think I remember seeing a call notice though.

I guess I better check that now… ๐Ÿ˜…ย  ย ** pause while listening to voice mail **

Well I have absolutely no idea what the hell that was all about. Some fella left a message, and he knew my first name, saying that he was from Lowe’s installation and that he was calling about my “overnight cooktop” (I think) and wanted me to give him a call back to let him know if I’d be home. Heh… no idea. I guess I’ll find out tomorrow, but I can tell you right now the last thing I’m interested in is an overnight cooktop.

But anyway… all that’s left for me to do today is get these shirts onto hangers and up in the closet, and the towels onto the shelf into the bathroom and I’m golden. ๐Ÿ˜Ž Just gonna take that for what it’s worth, and I’ll worry about tomorrow when tomorrow gets here. I’m just happy that I figured out what it took to get me through this day.

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Saying Goodbye

Yesterday was rough. ๐Ÿ˜ I woke up and hit the road shortly after dawn, because I wanted to allow myself plenty of time to compete with rush hour traffic heading towards Columbus. I just wanted to get up there early enough so that I could spend a while with Cassi and Lily before we had to head to the vet’s office. ๐Ÿ˜ž Once we were there, I couldn’t make myself stay in the room when the time came – but thankfully Cassi was strong enough to stay in there with Lily through all of it. As I sat out in the car waiting for her, I found what I felt was the best way to think about it…

Cassi loves Lily and didn’t want her to go, obviously, but she knew that for Lily’s sake – that’s what needed to happen. And Lily… I like to think that Lily didn’t want to go, but only because she didn’t want her adoptive mommy (and the other kitties in the house) to be sad and miss her. ๐Ÿ˜ข But Lily herself, I’m sure that if she would have been able to say it, she’d have said that it was time to go.ย  Thinking about it in human terms… as all of us approach our final years, there’s a pretty good chance that we ourselves will go through days, weeks, or maybe even months where we’d probably like to ask God to go ahead take us – due to the discomfort that often comes with that old age. ๐Ÿ‘ด๐Ÿป๐Ÿ˜Ÿ

We were sniffling and sobbing all the way back to the apartment, and she was telling me even more little stories about Lily and some of the other cats that I hadn’t heard before… kind of a rolling “wake” of good kitty memories. ๐Ÿ™‚๐Ÿ˜ธ Of course I couldn’t help but start thinking about Maven’s age, wondering how I’m going to be able to face it once that day comes for her… but luckily I’ve got both Cassi and Genesee who said they’re willing (and want) to be there. I wish I could have made myself stay in the room for Cassi, but she understood – and actually said that she never expected me to. ๐Ÿคจ She basically said it in a way to let me know that she stayed in the room not only for Lily, but also so that I didn’t have to.

Off The Clock

Went to bed early last night, woke up a little before 8am feeling pretty damn good. A startling feeling, for sure, but I intend to roll with it today. ๐Ÿ˜ It’s something that’s difficult to explain, and I know it sounds a bit weird, but over the past several days I’ve made it widely known among friends and acquaintances that I should be considered out of rotation for the moment. ๐Ÿค” It’s just that I hate having to tell friends “no” when they text me out of the blue, maybe wanting to do this or that… so it was essentially a preemptive thing.

But waking up without much pain, knowing that my schedule is essentially clear for a while… at least when it comes to socializing… I think it just (more quickly than I expected) took a weight off of my mind. So I decided that I was gonna spend the morning being a potato, and then this afternoon I’m gonna tackle all my bills and paperwork and tend to the random things around the house that need my attention.

Laundry is all done, folded, or hung… I don’t have any dishes, so it really is just random stuff that’s waiting for my focus in the different rooms of the house. This probably feels like a frivolous thing to make a blog entry about, but you don’t know how much it sets my mind at ease to have no social obligations, not a whole lot of pain in my neck and shoulder, and a house that isn’t a mess. ๐Ÿ™‚ I know that at any moment one of my attorneys could call me and I’d have to go into work mode for a bit, but so far so good. (I’m actually gonna give them both a call tomorrow if I don’t hear from them, just so I feel like I’m still on top of things.)ย ๐Ÿค“โ˜๐Ÿป