I Forgot That “I Know A Guy”

I was just gonna do a drive-by and throw those pet stairs out of my car as I passed Amy’s house… heh… well, maybe not quite like that – but I was gonna just set it in her driveway so she wouldn’t have to come out and deal with company or “outside” until she wanted to. 😏🐩 But I ended up walking it up to her porch so she came out for a while, just about the same time that Rick got home – so we sat there for a while catching up on school stuff, kid/family stuff, medical stuff, home repair stuff, etc. 🙂

Now, I knew that Rick is a handyman, and then some… but for whatever reason it didn’t even cross my mind to ask him what he thought about the garage door. 🤔🤷🏻‍♂️ I think when I see something that makes me go “oof” so hard, it’s just something that I figure is beyond the typical person’s ability to repair. But that’s the thing, Rick’s not typical… the same way I’ve absorbed all sorts of nerd skills and knowledge over the years, he’s done the same with probably almost any type of contracting work that you could think of. 💪🏻👷🏻‍♂️ The other thing is that I subconsciously don’t wanna “put my shit” onto someone I know, even if I’m paying them.

But after looking at the damage in more detail myself, he might be right… a repair is probably possible – and maybe just the initial overwhelming aspect of it made me think otherwise. Replacing the door would be ideal, and will still need to be done at some point, but if I can get it fixed to where it works at least as well as it has been – then I think I’m gonna try to go that route. Lessen the “ugh” of another potential “big thing” to deal with, as I described it earlier. And he’d probably be out here tomorrow night if I asked, but I think I’m still gonna wait until after my dose and scan. It would just be a little too much “stuff” going on for my twitchy and tired brain to wanna deal with.

But knowing all the big projects that he’s done, either as part of a crew or completely on his own, hearing him talk with such confidence about all of it… it reminded me that I see problems a lot differently than someone with two well-functioning arms, let alone even more differently than someone who does that type of shit every day for a living. So I’m glad that Amy found that pup, which had me go donate the stairs, where I ended up talking to Rick, which now has me feeling a little more optimistic about my options. 😏🤷🏻‍♂️

Glad I’m home now, though. 😓 Didn’t take the extra socializing into account when I left the house (since it wasn’t planned) so by the time I made it in town, did my things, and got back home – it was taking everything I had to not yack up today’s lunch. 🤢 But it was still nice, hanging out with them for a bit anyway.

Something Like That

This heatwave that we’re currently going through… it’s a pretty good way to explain how I’ve been feeling over the past few days. Just go outside, walk around your property for about 15 minutes, then stand there a while… and that’s basically how I’ve been feeling each day all day. Again, not bitching, just trying to describe it in a way that people can understand.

Thankfully I’m almost half way through the process, so at least there’s a light at the end of the tunnel that I can look forward to. No matter what results I get, at least I can get back on my thyroid meds after the scan has been completed. It makes me feel bad for folks who have suffered with thyroid issues all of their lives, because the constant nausea, overheating, and dizziness… it’s no joke. Not thrilled that it has been made crystal clear that this will indeed be a medication that I’ll be taking for the rest of my life though.

I’m a cheap-ass, so I usually wouldn’t do this, but last night I turned the thermostat all the way down to 68 when I went to bed. I knew I’d be sleeping at least part way into the day and the house would heat up quickly, but despite it staying that cool in the house – I woke up early and completely drenched in sweat again. (Also… gross.) That’s why I mention how far along I am in the process… because if I didn’t know that there was an end to this, it would be some scary shit.

I’ve been drinking a lot more water, so the muscle spasms and dehydration hopefully won’t become an issue. It’s pretty shitty though, that the insurance industry has decided that this is an acceptable thing for patients to go through while preparing for their second radiation dosage. The alternative way, staying on your meds and just getting two injections before the scan… that costs several thousand dollars, so I guess you can’t blame them for trying to find somewhere to cut costs in what has likely been a very expensive surgery.

Again though, knowing that this is a temporary thing for me, it really makes me feel for those folks who don’t have insurance at all, and even for the people that do but have a chronic condition that still isn’t covered by their plan for whatever reason. As with most things like this, it’s something that we don’t think much about until it starts to affect us personally. So, yeah… still feeling super awful… and I feel like it’s continuing to slowly get worse, but I’ll be good as long I just keep reminding myself…

“It’s only temporary. It’s the lack of meds, not anything more scary. You’ll have more answers soon. Just (n) more days and this will all be over. Consider yourself blessed that you’ve made it this far. Plenty of other people have it worse than you, and it’s not temporary for them. Yeah, it sucks… but don’t be a pussy. It’s only temporary.” etc…

I’m trying to stay positive. I need to stay positive.

Tired of This Shit

I’m not sure how this month’s appointment with the WC doctors is gonna go. 😕 I think I’m actually seeing Dr Walter this time, when it was the new guy that I had the in-depth discussion with about the state of my treatment last month. Regardless, since the WC insurer is coming at me with the shenanigans again, the conversation will have to revolve around that rather than the stuff that I started bringing up last month.

I’ve got to be careful, because it almost feels like a “trap” that WC could use against me, but this month I have to start discussing possible alternatives for the meds that I’m taking right now. Because if they are somehow able to weasel out of paying for what I’m currently taking, the cost of two of those medications would simply be too much for me to continue taking them long term. 🙁 That’s where the “trap” part comes in.

When I start discussing more affordable potential alternatives for the meds I’m currently taking, I want it to be clear with my doctors and in my records that I have no desire or intention to make any changes now… and that the research and discussion is really just to act as my parachute if I get pushed out of the plane. But I can see where my fear of being forced to pay for my own meds, which has made me research cheaper (but likely less effective) alternatives, means that I now know that there are cheaper alternatives, so they’ll probably think that they have the right to force me to change to them – despite my preference to keep taking the ones that I’ve been taking. 😏 Heh… I know, that sounds a bit convoluted, but it basically make sense, no?

But until I’m able to discuss this with them, I know that I’m just taking barely-educated shots in the dark when it comes to what might or might not be suitable replacements. 🎯😎 I mean, even though I know that Lyrica has very specific actions – at its most basic level I know that it is considered an anti-seizure / anti-convulsant medication… so that’s where I start looking. 🤓📚 And now I have four or five medications that I think could be good replacements… but for all I know, even though they’re anti-seizure, they may have totally different actions – and ones that aren’t even close to being applicable to my situation. 😒

So for now that’s all I can really do… look for “close” meds and make sure there are more positive side effects than negative. Then I’ll just hope that I’m actually on to something, and that information can be put in my back pocket until it is needed. Between now and then I just have to figure out how to condense all of this crap down into a tolerable three to four minutes. 😳⏱👨🏻‍⚕️ Gotta impress the importance of this on him, while also not rambling so much that my point gets lost in the noise. I’m better at that than you’d think, actually… it just doesn’t seem that way here because I know I can go on and on about something and it doesn’t matter, since hardly anyone reads this blog anyway. 😏🤷🏻‍♂️

Brrr… Bleh

Not feeling great today. My neck is fine, just feeling kinda woozy and bleh… for now I’m gonna blame the Whopper and fries that I had late last night. 🤢 I don’t have the furnace on yet, so I woke up to a chilly house – and then when I went in the living room and turned on the space heater, it made some sputtering and popping noises before the fans began to deliver cold air. 😒 I can’t complain though, because I got this thing cheap at the HFH Re-Store years ago, and I’ve gotten more than my money’s worth out of her.

I hopped on Amazon and found an oscillating ceramic heater for a decent price, so I should have that in a couple of days. I dunno, I’m one of those weird folks that would rather have a cold house and then heat only the area that I’m occupying, so even though it’s a new expense – it still helps me keep overall heating costs down, or at least that’s the story I’m going with. (Always needing to justify anything I buy for myself.)

Still debating how I’m going to spend the bulk of my day. I’d like to get a little bit more stuff done that I’ve been working on, but that’s gonna be based on how I end up feeling now. I was considering doing some work outside… I mean, my yard guys take care of the weed whacking and mowing, but there’s all kinds of other stuff that needs trimmed or tended to. That’s definitely going to wait now. I’m sure the neighbors are at the point though where they glance over and grimace 😑 so I do wanna get on that soon.