So Glad That I Prepared

What a morning. Felt like crap yesterday, went to bed early, got up early, drove my ass all the way up to Sawmill Rd, and about five minutes away from arriving at the doctor’s office – someone from my attorney’s office calls me to tell me that he just got an email from the doctor, and that my appointment had to be postponed. πŸ˜• I didn’t recognize the caller, and just wanted to confirm that nobody was trying to pull any BS on me, so since I was basically right there – I just continued on to the office and spoke with the receptionist, who confirmed it for me. Nice lady, super apologetic… but still… what a bunch of crap. 😠

I forget how it was worded in the letter that I got, but in no unclear terms it said that if I missed that appointment, my case would essentially be dropped and they’d no longer cover anything regarding my injury / disability. πŸ˜’ Granted, I was up there early, but I’m still pretty sure that if I called them a half hour before I was supposed to be there and said that I couldn’t make it – that “call off” or rescheduling wouldn’t fly. Not sure why there was a sudden change of plans, but I suppose I’ll just wait until the next phone call or letter to find out when I have to make that trip again.

So yeah, that two hours in the car was awesome for my knee. That’s unfortunately one of the bad positions for it, that “in between” bend that you’ve got in the car for the brake and gas. Cruise helped a little, but people don’t know how to drive, so even that I could only use for a couple of miles at a time while I gave my leg a rest.

Got home and decided to check in on FB real quick… and my buddy that lost his mom last month… it seems that his dad passed away last night. 😞 Some people might say, “Boy, maybe you shouldn’t use FB if so much stuff is sucking for people.” but to that I would say that if I didn’t get on Facebook to make the rarer-than-usual post or scroll through and “like” or respond to folks on there – I honestly wouldn’t have any communication with hardly anyone. πŸ™ And not everything is bad for everyone… and passive communications seems to be the only thing working for me right now, so… πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ

Looking at the silver lining for my morning though… yeah, my knee is kinda screwed again, but at least I didn’t have to go through the “don’t do anything that will hurt yourself” tests, which inevitably cause me to hurt myself in order to demonstrate my defect and disability. πŸ™„ Maybe the reschedule date will be in a little over a month, when I’ll be glowing with radiation again. 😏

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How It’s Supposed To Be

Okay, gotta change the mood to something lighter… just hopped onto Facebook to see a thread over 100 comments long, everyone arguing about how the police treated the man who was firing a gun in the city as the cops looked on. Wanna see a thread where every damn person thinks that they are absolutely, 100% correct and everyone else is an idiot or moron? 😏 Go find that thread in one of the local Lancaster groups. πŸ™„

But like I said… changing the mood. As I’m sitting here on the floor with my knee in front of the space heater, Maven just jumped up on the couch behind me and started staring and purring at me. 😏😸 See, I started the process of grooming (shaving) her a couple of days ago… and she’s gotten to the point now where she actually likes it. At least to a point. πŸ˜„ So I think she’s trying to give me a hint that she’s ready for a few more swipes here in a bit. Oops… no… she actually just curled up on my mail and fell asleep.

It still amazes me, how far she’s come from when I first got her. You couldn’t even pet her belly when she first got here… and now I can lay her on her back between my legs and shave her belly with a loud trimmer and she’ll mostly just take it. πŸ˜… Although the twitchy tail does reveal that that’s probably her least favorite part to be worked on. But I’m lucky… I’ve got a couple of throw carpets in the bathroom, and when I go in there she’ll usually follow me for a few minutes of grooming, and then when she’s had enough she’ll take a few steps out into the hallway where she knows she’ll get the good hair brush treatment which she loves. 😻

I think it’s partly that, in general, I’m pretty boring when I’m just hanging around the house with her, so she really eats up all of the attention that I’m then giving her as we go through the process. She only gets twitchy about it when it comes to her belly and her butt. I think that’s just because it’s probably a weird feeling… and a very vulnerable position for her to put herself into willingly. But yeah, so far so good, because I’ve taken more fur off of her in the first two days of this process than I’ve usually been able to do over the course of an entire week before. πŸ˜ƒ I think between it getting warmer, and her getting tired of licking and cleaning all the time, she’s actually as anxious to get this done as I am.Β 

(Day One, Session One: Already waiting patiently by the door for some more swipes and brushing… 😊 )

I think the good trick this time is that for the times when she doesn’t just follow me into the bathroom, I snatch her up either right when she’s falling asleep or right when she’s waking up… when she just doesn’t have the oomph to give me too much shit right away. 😁 I’m probably gonna give her a break from it today though, to also continue giving my knee a break. I’ve got two loads of laundry to (hopefully) bring upstairs and fold, and I wanna do that while I’m still feeling decent and before I let more hair loose into the house.

I’m so glad that Genesee decided that I needed her when I moved in here. 😏 Whenever you’ve got a critter, and then lose that critter (😒) part of you says that you don’t wanna do it again. The inevitable heartbreak of getting and loving a critter that you know will eventually end as it always does, as much as you don’t want to feel like you’re just getting a “replacement” for a critter that you just lost. πŸ˜• If it would have been up to me to decide, I probably wouldn’t have gotten another cat after Kitty B. But just as any true “critter person” will tell you – I can’t imagine what life would have been like without all of the years that I’ve had with ol’ girl here. 😊

I Want Smear

Every now and then I muck around with a new time-lapse app to see if I can get a really “smeary” lighting effect that I want – but for whatever reason I can’t figure the shit out. It makes sense… on a bright day, even at the lowest ISO, you can’t have a long shutter speed because everything will just get blown out. So I try to do it digitally, but you can still see too much clarity in the smears… but still, this is an interesting looking video.

(This should be available at 4k 60fps, but you can at least change to 1080p 60fps up here β†—)

Once it is actually night time you can use much longer shutter speeds and the smear looks like a true smear, so next time there’s a perfectly clear night and decently “full” moon I’m gonna maybe have to try it again – but only after dark. Another option is capturing a sunset (and clouds, and car lights, and plane lights) from Mt Pleasant… but that means, a) climbing the damn mountain, which I haven’t done for a couple of years, and b) hoping that they don’t have those damn LED flood lights lighting up the face of it while I’m trying to do my shit. I’ll have to see if there’s a schedule for when they do or don’t do that.

Oh, and obviously if you lock the shutter and ISO for the brightness of the scene when it starts, you’ll probably get some super dark and super bright parts as clouds pass. The alternative is auto exposure, which causes some off jumping around of the exposure during the video – as well as making the whole thing look considerably less dramatic since the phone is always trying to make the exposure appealing. Meh… this is me, trying to find something fun to do… something to have interest in again. Carry on.

C’est la vie

Well, I suppose it was bound to happen one of these days, considering the amount of appointments and other obligations that I’ve got… but this morning I completely blew past my scheduled appointment with the psychiatrist. 😬 It was scheduled at 9am, so I knew it was gonna be a struggle, but I really thought I’d be fine. I mean, I haven’t missed any of my other stupid-early appointments… but I didn’t manage to fall asleep until after 4am, so meh… whatever, I guess. πŸ˜’

I shouldn’t look at it this way, but when I’m keeping up with all of the other stuff I need to be keeping up with, waiting a little bit longer to bring in the doctor that provides the happy pills… yeah, I guess I’m just not that worried about that. 😡 And I know, mental health is probably as important as physical health, but hey… I’ve got the counselor now, and I’ve already got that next appointment scheduled, so that’ll have to be good enough for the time being.

The two offices are related though, so I’m not sure if ghosting the pharmaceutical shrink will have any affect when I go to the talky shrink. 😐 I’ll give ’em a call on Monday and make nice and see what they say. I did make it to the dentist though a few hours later, so I can report that maintenance on the lower part of my mouf is now finished and those teefs are about as good as they’re gonna get. πŸ‘©πŸ»β€βš•οΈπŸ‘πŸ» The permanent crowd actually feels really natural, although I’ve been afraid to look too closely in the mirror in case it looks wonky.

Unrelated to Adulting

Okay, now that I’ve got all that other shit out of my brain for the moment… now I can write about the other stuff from the past week or so. Let me start off by talking about a new toy that I couldn’t resist. 😊 It was only $80 shipped, which isn’t too bad… and considerably less than what the original (with disk drive) would have cost new. It’s called The C64 Mini, and while it’s not an official Commodore product, it’s essentially an entire C64 emulated on a teeny board, in a teeny replica of the original “breadbin” style Commodore 64.Β πŸ˜ƒ And before you ask, no… the keyboard doesn’t actually work… but you can plug a USB keyboard into it and use it as an actual computer – and the company intends to come out with a full-sized, completely working replica soon. 😁

I’ve yet to even power the thing on, because I’m waiting for a spell when I’ll be able to do nothing but mess with the thing… which will include upgrading the firmware to allow me to load any program from a flash drive, and loading it up with all of my favorites from when I was a kid. It does have 64 licensed games built in, but most people are like me and get it so they’ll have the closest thing to an actual C64 – but with HDMI output – for the best looking Commodore 8-bit computer ever. 😊

I suppose everyone has a “thing” from their generation that they loved when they were younger, and therefore want to have again once they’re old. 😏 Classic video games and Commodore computing are definitely my thing, the same way that HAM radio is Dad’s thing… and like me, he’s still got a few toys as well that he plays with to this day.Β πŸ€“ I’m even learning how to take a C64 disk image, open it on a Windows 10 laptop, add or remove C64 programs as I see fit, and then export the new C64 disk image for use on this thing. 😯 That’s how it is with me though… give me something I’m genuinely passionate about, and my brain will start absorbing everything that it needs to know about it.

Okay, gotta keep this entry short-ish. 🀨 Maven is almost completely done with her home-grooming, which means my bathroom and living room carpet areΒ covered with poofed hair for now. 😟 I’m lucky that she’s so cooperative though. In fact, for the most part she loves the process. Bri came for a visit right before Halloween, not only to hang out (she drew the face on the pumpkin and I carved it upΒ πŸŽƒπŸ˜) but to also distract from her mom’s deteriorating health. She’s actually had a couple of good days, so it was nice to see her have a little more energy. However, my friend Greg, his mother passed away this past week. 😒 She was having a rough time, so it’s one of those deals where you’re almost relieved.

Cassi came down to spend the night on one of her days off. Her life is so hectic, between all of the hours that she’s been putting in lately and then having her, her mom, and her (very opinionated) 17 year-old sister all there at her house, making noise at each other. 😏 So coming here, even if half of her time is spent sleeping… it really is like a teeny mental vacation for her.Β πŸ™‚ Plus she helped me out with some chores, including the whole de-flea-ing process with the sprays and the carpet powder, etc. (Plus the most important and helpful thing… getting Maven to swallow that damn Capstar flea killin’ pill.)

As we sat in the living room watching the new “Charmed” show, we also each had our notebooks and were fastidiously jotting down the things that we intend to work on in the next few days. It’s strange how just having her here “working” in the same way that I was, how it helps to settle my brain and let me get down to business without getting as easily distracted by Twitter, Facebook, or YouTube. 😡

So there ya go… just so you don’t think my entire existence is grumping and bitching. 😐 There’s always some good sprinkled in there – and even when it isn’t “good” in general, I’m thankful that I have the right kind of friends to help me through those times, and vice versa.Β πŸ™‚Β Okay, carry on…

Abundance Of Caution

We’re down to about a week-and-a-half before my surgery. 😳 And let me tell you, I’ve been dealing with some serious anxiety issues since the beginning of this past week – and I’m finding it hard to shake. πŸ˜₯ I’m right on the edge, always, and the slightest thing will push me over into labored breathing, chest pains, dizziness, etc. 😟 So while it might make me “difficult” in some people’s minds between now and my surgery, I’ve got to do whatever it takes to keep my anxiety levels low, or at least unchanged if I’m still managing to hang on to being okay.

It’s kind of embarrassing, but I honestly need to keep myself in a mental health bubble for the next 10 days. πŸ˜’ I don’t want anything to happen that will risk me not being able to have the surgery when scheduled, and going to the ER for a panic attack with severe chest pains probably wouldn’t help that cause. πŸ˜• Now, I am gonna tell the doctors and surgeon everything that I’ve experienced up to that point, before I go in, because I absolutely want them to know… but yeah, right now is not the time for me to deal with anything that I don’t absolutely need to deal with.

Cassi helped with that over the past couple of days. πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈπŸ˜ I went and got her on Thursday after she got off work, because she had two days off in a row and wanted to spend them here with me. ☺ We never figured out how to make our “couple” relationship work, but boy are we good at being each other’s “person” in times of need. And it’s because neither of us need much… just the distraction from our respective lives that’s somehow provided by just being in each other’s presence.

As for what we did over those two days… there’s really not much to talk about. We just plop down in the living room, turn on Grey’s Anatomy on Netflix, and just sit with each other and watch, talk, eat mac and cheese… heh… just “normal” stuff that doesn’t add to the anxiety. The only times it got a little rough for both of us was when one of the episodes would be about thyroids or cancer and the results. Probably shouldn’t have watched those particular episodes, but it’s also good to think about everything realistically, all of the potential outcomes – and letting myself cry a little bit and be scared with her… it was much better than doing that same thing by myself. πŸ™‚

So yeah, the last couple of days were really nice, and really needed… and today, well, I’m calling it “a day off” since I don’t intend to do much (if any) communicating with anyone, and instead focus on things that I just personally need to do before it’s time for my surgery. 😊 The doctors and surgeon haven’t give me any reason to worry about the surgery. None. But you know how it is… you still wanna kinda get things in order, just to give yourself that peace of mind. And doing that sorta thing makes me feel better… makes me feel productive, which is something I always aim for.

Mood is good… I’m hangin’ in there.

The Predator In The Predator

Another day, another celebrity scandal. This time it is with the movie “The Predator” and the director, Shane Black. It seems that Shane hired a friend of his for a bit part, one in which he was acting with only Olivia Munn, and that friend is actually a registered sex offender. πŸ˜• The crime was an incident several years ago where he was sending sexually inappropriate things to a minor via email. For this he was charged, convicted, and did time in jail. The worst part is that Black didn’t inform the other actors in the movie, to give them a chance to say whether they would or would not work with someone on the sex offender registry.

So Olivia Munn did what most anyone would do when they found out, including contacting the studio to express her anger about being kept in the dark and pushing for her scene with this man to be removed from the movie before it was released. πŸ‘πŸ» They didn’t respond immediately, likely talking with the editors and figuring out how they could do it without affecting the movie – but what she wanted ended up happeningΒ and the scene was cut. Even if you think that people who have “served their time” deserve another shot at what they want to do for a career, it’s hard to argue that the way the director kept this information from Munn and the others wasn’t wrong.

At that point you’d think the matter would have been considered settled, or at least placed on pause while the actors do promotion for the movie, which is due to be released in the next week or two. πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ But despite the studio having her back and altering the movie, it appears that Munn is still mad – because she’s continuing to talk about the incident in multiple interviews. 🀨 Her co-stars have been with her for a few of them, and some of them have put out statements obviously condemning sexual predators and supporting Munn… but those same co-stars are now being attacked by the predictable social justice mob because they’re allegedly not supportive of Olivia Munn. πŸ™„

They’re all men, and of course they’re now being called every name in the book. Think about it. πŸ€” They’re actors hired for a movie, they did their part, they are proud of their work, and they want to do these media events to hype their movie as intended. The director, completely beyond the actors’ control or knowledge, hired a sex offender, so now they’ve all been dropped into the lion’s den when it comes to people waiting for and expecting a reaction or statement.

As other celebrities have learned, and as these actors are learning now – there’s no correct answer you can give when it comes to something like this. 😠 Even if you stand on the table and scream how much you hate sex offenders and can’t believe the director would hire one, there’s still gonna be a huge group of folks who will attack you for not giving reformed criminals a second chance. You bigot.

So, since Munn decided that she was going to continue talking about the controversy at whatever press appearances she had for the movie, the rest of the cast decided that they would not be joining her. Probably because they didn’t see the point in attending movie hype interviews where they couldn’t hype their movie. Also, like I said, Munn’s original problem/complaint had been solved, so it isn’t as if she is actively fighting for something that requires her co-stars’ support. And that’s what they’re being attacked for… for not supporting Munn as she rehashes her original complaint. πŸ˜’ She has every right to complain about whatever she wants, but why should the rest of the cast feel obligated to follow her around and nod their heads in agreement, when they had as much to do with hiring the guy as Olivia Munn did? (ie: none)

Most of the negative things that I’ve read regarding Munn aren’t talking about how she wanted (and got) the scene cut where she unknowingly acted opposite a sexual predator. People generally understand that. What people don’t understand is why she’s handling this in a way that seems designed to torpedo the success of this movie. She’s still upset at the director, even going so far as to not accept his public apology, and is now trying to damage him and the studio financially. 😐 Hear me out…

Munn’s original complaint was legit. Her request for the scene to be removed was reasonable, and the director and studio obliged and did just that. Now, during the press events, she could have done the traditional interviews, focusing on the film, with the other actors there as well, also focusing on the movie… but that’s not what she’s doing. She has chosen to go on at length about that controversy, which is her right – but if her co-stars don’t want to take on that burden as well, you can’t blame them. Especially when she’s doing everything in a way that tarnishes the movie, surrounds it in drama, and likely reduces its potential for success. Those co-stars worked just as hard as she did, so you could understand them being upset at how she’s doing this.

And the thing is, I’m all for her making her point. If she wants to make people aware that Hollywood still has icky directors and icky producers that hire icky people, then she has a perfect example here and she should run with it… but not days before the movie that they all worked so hard on opens. πŸ˜’ The director and studio fixed the immediate problem, so there is nothing further she needs to “fight for” regarding this particular movie – so she should get out there and do the traditional promotional press that actors and actresses are expected to do. No harm would have come from waiting. It wouldn’t be the first time that someone had to bite their tongue and support a movie that they weren’t particularly proud of, but she has chosen to make it “a thing” right now, when it will hurt everyone the most.

So that’s what I think people are complaining about. That she’s taking an issue that was resolved, and now she’s amplifying it in interviews and on social media in a way that’s harmful to the movie, the director, the other actors, etc. She could have still promoted the movie, or even not done interviews if that’s what she’d prefer, and just waited for the movie to get through its first few weeks where the most of its money will be made. πŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ The facts wouldn’t change, the issue would still be there, and she would still have plenty of media outlets that would be happy to hear her out, just as social media would do. In fact, that would earn her more respect – having stood up for herself during the shoot, gotten the studio to make changes, went out and gritted her teeth and supported the movie and her co-stars, and then she could have blasted out the “behind the scenes / yeah, but you didn’t know…” for everyone to see, hear, or read – and likely agree with.

I’m not sure why Olivia Munn, making statements on the issue, requires all of her co-stars to be there with her or somehow “support her” more than they already have. What more does she need “support” with? She’s a strong woman and she’s doing fine alerting everyone to what happened on her own. πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ Her co-stars just didn’t feel like getting wrapped up in drama, so the SJW mob has written them off as monsters, just as bad as the RSO, just as bad as the director, just as bad as the studio. πŸ˜’ And the ones that are reaffirming their support for her… they’re still being attacked as being too late, too disingenuous, too lacking, etc. The same way that Munn won’t accept Black’s apology, the SJW mob will not accept anything supportive that her co-stars say. They want her co-stars to offer those sentiments, but only so they can attack them for it. 😠

A whole slew of people who want to be mad about something, like spiders waiting for a vibration in their web – and then when they get it they won’t let go. πŸ˜” It feels too good to them. Every single co-star of hers could come forward with a genuine, heartfelt show of support – even if they’ve already shown support before it got as big as it is now – and the mob would still swarm on them, wrap them up in their webs, and suck the life out of them for as long as possible. 😏 Miserable people who only feel good by making other people miserable, whether they truly deserve it or not. 😟 And, sadly, they believe their outbursts, attacks, and twitter rants actually do something to improve the thing that they’re upset about. “I’M FURIOUS. I’M MAKING A DIFFERENCE. I’M A GOOD PERSON.”Β πŸ™‡πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ


Wow… heh… this was way longer than I expected it to be. πŸ˜… I never really know until the words start pouring out of my brain and through my fingers, how long some of these impassioned rants will be. It really helps with my anxiety right now, as well as keeping my brain focused on “other stuff” and distracted from the stuff around here… 😳 so just know that when I pop off with some seemingly random posts like this now and then, there’s probably more than the obvious reason behind it. πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈπŸ˜