It’s funny… I’m literally sitting here cautiously. 😐 Realizing that I’ve accomplished quite a bit over this past week, and that if I play my cards right – my weekend might actually be my weekend – and I’m not even feeling that bad right now, physically. 🙂 I just mean that I don’t have much to do other than some laundry, a little picking up, and a bit more paperwork, so I should be able to make myself relax and just do nothing… or something. Who knows.
And when I say that I’m being cautious, it’s because I know how easy it is for stuff to just spring up, whether being “stuff to do” or with how I’m feeling… so I’m in this “tiptoe” mode, as if being that way will prevent whatever unexpected thing that might come. 😏
I’ve gotta pick up my other batch of meds tomorrow and do a couple of things at the post office, so that could give me an excuse to do some other shit while I’m in town… hell… I don’t even know what the weather’s supposed to be like, nor do I have any idea of what I might even want to do. Heh… guess I probably shouldn’t overthink it… so everyone just wish me luck towards getting a couple good days to myself.
It’s been a pretty bleh weekend so far. Had trouble sleeping during the week, getting 3-5 hours on average each day/night, then on Friday night I slept for 16 hours. 😳 Sounds great in theory, but then I ended up staying awake until almost dawn today… and to top it off, I was gifted with horrible, horrible nightmares. 😞 Not “boogeyman” type dreams, but more of the “family-based” variety. So I woke up a bit after 12p today with the energy of a boiled potato.
But yesterday, even though I had enough sleep where I could have done it, I just couldn’t make myself go to the Sweet Corn Festival to do the traditional “walkin’ around” with Jim and other friends. The cool weather and constant drizzle didn’t help, but I just didn’t have it in me anyway – so maybe the crap weather was a blessing. 😒
I’m probably going to drop even further off the radar today than I usually am, so I can hopefully shake off the crappy residual feeling from my dreams by watching the NASCAR double-header… and by possibly doing some random chores around the house during the commercial breaks. 🤔 It would be nice to start the week a little bit ahead of the game, especially since I never know how my sleep will go anymore.
For the record, there were some good moments over the past several days, and I’ll probably get around to mentioning them at some point… but now is not that time.
I only got about three hours of sleep this afternoon before my brain decided that it was time to wake up and “do something” unspecified. 😒 It’s the weekend though, so for the most part I’ve been able to avoid feeling obligated to be too productive… and instead I’ve just been sitting here with the laptop and the new Roku (free w/DirecTV Now sign-up) hooked to the living room TV, downloading a crapload of channels/apps.
The DirecTV Now service currently doesn’t have a DVR function. So that means that if I want to watch any specific show, I need to have my ass planted in front of the television at the time that the show is actually airing otherwise I’ll miss it. 😳 A novel concept, right? Watching a program when it’s scheduled to be broadcast… heh
But that’s also why I’m doing all of the channel/app acquisition that I’m doing right now… because many of these individual network channels for the Roku are loaded with “on demand” programs or shows that have just recently aired. Not quite as good as a DVR, since only certain networks offer Roku channels that work with the DirecTV Now subscriber information, but it’s an acceptable substitute – at least until they get the whole “cloud DVR” thing figured out and released to the masses.
Now I have to cross my fingers and hope that once I’ve selected and activated all of these channels on the main TV, that the TV in the bedroom will sync with that information and automatically download and install all of the same channels on its own.
This weekend ended up being exactly what I needed it to be. 😌 I also realized that in addition to just enjoying the company that I was with, having a human in my immediate proximity went a long way towards keeping my brain from getting stuck in the “on” position like it almost always does. (Much like how you have to jiggle the toilet handle just the right way to keep the water pump from running for hours and burning itself out. 😏) Now my company has gone, the weekend is coming to an end… but there’s still a new Rick and Morty episode tonight along with the season finale of Game of Thrones, so that provides one last little bit of goody before it’s back to normal tomorrow.
The current “you’ll hear from us” state of both of my attorney-led endeavors has got me feeling a bit restless again, so the first thing I’m going to do tomorrow is give those folks a call. I’m not sure that any prodding from me will make either of those situations move any more quickly, but at least I’ll feel like I’m trying to do something about it.
Another thing that I was reminded of this weekend is how nice it can be when I’m not perpetually absorbing the news of the day. It’s difficult for me to consciously avoid the news. I want to stay informed. I want to stay outraged at the things one should be outraged against. But much like the way I swore off of HLN years ago after shows like Dr Drew and Nancy Grace started to make me a little bit crazy… heh… I should really consider limiting my consumption of political news, even from the shows which present it from a point of view that is often similar to my own. (This topic is honestly worthy of it’s own multi-paragraph entry here. 🤔 Perhaps soon.)
Other information briefs: Christina handled her first chemo treatment like a champ, but today she cut her hair quite short in anticipation of the eventual hair loss. Jim’s mom is still putting up a fight against her cancer, but the probability of recovery at this point is not good. 😔 And then my friend Rick Kitzmiller… he’s got a lot of support, but complications during chemotherapy are starting to put his recovery at risk as well. 😟 “I’m just treading water.” is the way he most recently described it to friends via a Facebook post.
Obviously, I’ve also got other friends and family who are facing their own flavors of health problems (as am I) so it’s not that I’m not thinking about them and praying for them too… it’s just that cancer has a way of getting a bigger collective gasp, and those afflicted with it tend to stay near the front of your mind whether it’s fair or not. It’s just allincredibly sad, and in those times when I’m not thinking about it or talking about it, I just have to totally push it out of my mind or risk drowning in my thoughts.