Normally I’m appreciative of the fact that I dream almost every time I fall asleep, and that usually they are quite elaborate… sometimes taking place in the same setting, or “starring” the same people, as dreams I had since I was a kid. Every now and then I even am aware enough that I’m dreaming, that it gives me a slight influence over what happens during them. 🤨😯
Lately though, my brain seems determined to run through a laundry list of ways that I should die. 😟 It doesn’t get to the point where it actually happens, so I don’t know if that “means anything” when it comes to dream analysis, but the lead up to being startled awake is still pretty craptacular.
- I was in an abandoned city, everything looked damaged by earthquakes, fire, random destruction… and I found a hotel that looked somewhat like the old Continental Motel we used to stay at in Atlantic City. A few stories tall, inner courtyard, all of the windows busted out and curtains blowing in the wind, everything covered with a layer of dust. I think I was just looking for a place to camp, but someone snuck up on me and fired two long chains with knives on the ends at me, both of which hit and went through both of my forearms. Once that happened, I was essentially attached to the chains, and the unseen person began dragging me along the walkway through the broken glass, down the stairs, and eventually over the guardrail and onto the ground below.
- I was exploring the old house we used to live in out in the country, looking for Mom and Dad, late at night… opening the rear door and walking into the foyer, the doors slammed shut and all of the lights went out. I shouted to see if either of them could hear me, but no sound was coming from my mouth as the house began shaking and all the air was sucked out of it. I was thrown into the ceiling where I was stuck in place by some unseen force, unable to make it back to the door where I’d be able to breathe.
- I was in another abandoned city, late evening, similar scene of destruction as if some sort of battle had gone through the area. I was moving along the outer side of a long brick building, trying to gather up my friends so we could get out of there. I found my friend Jim, but two patrol guards showed up and caught our other two unnamed friends and shot them. We began running away from the building and the guards, into a large field full of weeds, and the guards were firing on us the whole time. Jim got shot first, and was unable to walk, so I had to drag him along as bullets were whizzing by my head and striking the ground all around me. Eventually, even though we were probably 50 yards away, a bullet hit me in the lower back and I dropped to the ground, also unable to walk or get away.
Meh… there are more, but I know that dreams are only really interesting to the person that had them, since there’s no way to effectively convey the look and feeling of everything. 🤷🏻♂️😞 I wish I was a better artist, because I’d love to sketch out a storyboard for any of these dreams that feel a little too real. Hell, I might try sometime… I actually had a thick dream journal once where I sometimes did sketches. 🤔
But it’s no wonder my sleep schedule is a nightmare, pun intended, since there’s no way to get a good amount of solid sleep when shit like that is filling my unconscious thoughts. 😣 So I’ve just been resorting to sleeping whenever my body decides it needs it. A couple hours at night, a couple hours early in the day, a couple hours in the evening… not as if I can really keep it steady like that though, obviously. 😒
It doesn’t bother me that much anymore, other than causing my interactions with people to take a hit due to my availability being so random, not to mention I have days like today where I’m just too exhausted to even look at my phone. 😵 But now it’s midnight, I did get a little more sleep, so now I’ve got enough energy to probably keep me up all night, for better or worse. 🙄 I guess I’ll finish up the laundry and see what other chores I can knock out… make myself useful while I can. 🤷🏻♂️👍🏻